Points Deduction (not mine for once)

I'm giving my mom a Style Points Deduction for buying the dogs chew hooves that smell like cow manure when chewed. Of COURSE Quito loves them...so he's been gathering them up and burying them under the clothes on the floor in my room. This morning I gathered them up and tossed them all into the yard. It's OK if the yard smells like a pasture. It is NOT OK for my room to smell like one.

She also bought them peanut butter apple stuffed femurs. It blew my dad's mind. He's a simple guy. He doesn't believe in peanut butter stuffed femurs. My mom informed him that she could have purchased banana yogurt or bacon filled femurs. He thought that was funny, and asked her who did the prep work for the chef.

Dad is giving the scientist from last night's PBS special on wolverines a Style Points Deduction for inter-species adoption. Dad does not believe in inter-species adoptions because they are "unnatural." I pointed out that we "adopt" dogs. He told me our dogs didn't count, because Mom buys them peanut butter apple femurs, which "blurs the line a little."